Sunday, June 6, 2010



My mom would have a field day with the new craze in car stickers if she was still around. I remember her always saying things like,"Putting that "Baby on Board" window hanger in your car is like advertising for your child to be kidnapped." Well get this mom, now people have these customized stick figure stickers that advertise not only the fact that a baby is on board, but the entire family make-up, each member's hobby, and the family pets!
On the way home from church today, I spotted the best family sticker yet. On the rear window of a Nissan Quest were the following characters: Golfer dad, Shopaholic mom, Soccer Boy, Cheer Girl, Baby girl, Fido, Ferret and Bunny. I went on over to the dark side of my mind and surmised that if I chose to break into this house on it's well manicured cul-de-sac, the following would occur: Upon entering the house I would be greeted by a golf club wielding man in his skivvies, a woman in a T-Shirt ten sizes too large, swinging her new over sized Coach purse like a weapon. Soccer boy (who loves the game so much he sleeps in his cleats)awakes during all the ruckus and begins to kick my shins repeatedly. Cheer girl is so tired from her sleep over last night she doesn't even wake. We all pause to cover our ears the minute baby girl begins her shrill screeching after which the beating continues as I try to make my way out of this insane house. On the way out the Fido takes a chunk out of my rear, the ferret leaps onto my back, crawls up my shoulder and latches onto my ear, and I trip over fluffy the bunny.
I used to just think my mom was over protective, and a little nutty. It's the gentle reminders, like silly car stickers that help me keep her memory alive.

2 comments:

  1. That is so funny! My Dad was the same way. He got so mad when my sister got a tattoo, but later he was able to look on the bright side that it would be a good way to identify her if she ever went missing. :)

    I laughed out loud at the idea of the beating with the Coach purse. :)

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  2. Good stuff, Lauren.

    Never thought about that before with the stick figure families on the back of cars. I guess that means I'm not a psychopath, which is a good thing. But now I feel like I should be more paranoid... at least about that sort of thing.

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